Something I Don’t Know


Darkness, endless darkness surrounds me. What happened? Where am II struggle, but fail, to open my eyes, and I try, but fail, to let out a scream. It is as if my consciousness has been torn out of my body, which is unable to follow my orders. Just at this moment, a dreadful thought sweeps over my mind that I am dead. But this thought is too outrageous to be accepted. Probably, I’m just dreaming. Yes! I am dreaming, though I cannot recall when I fell asleep.

Noise, annoying noise, fills my ears. I open my eyes, finding myself lying on the street. Trying hard to remember what happened, I get back on my feet. I look around, noticing the surroundings are pretty chaotic. Ambulance sirens, crying, screaming, and moaning blend together. “Oh, God. There must have been be a terrible accident.” I murmur to myself. Suddenly, all the memories that had recently left me now return. Ten minutes ago, or maybe longer, my twin sister Anna and I were walking down the street and all of a sudden, anout of control truck rushed toward us. The last thing I can remember before I lost my consciousness is that Anna gave me a big push.

“Oh, no!” Terrified, I scream and move around wildly to find Anna. Seeing her livid face, I begin to cry even more wretchedly. When I approach her, her body is covered with a sheet.


Three days after Anna’s funeral, the whole family is still so wrapped up in grief. I seal myself in my room to meditate about her. Standing in front of the mirror and staring at the reflection of my face becomes the only way to “see” her, for we look so much alike.

“Tiffany, can you hear me?”

The voice that cannot be more familiar to me comes from behind me. Hearing my name called by someone who does not exist in this world anymore, my whole body breaks out with gooseflesh. I gradually turn around and find that Anna is sitting on my bed with her arms around her knees.

“Tiffany, I miss you so much. I hate to be separated from you.” Her tears roll down her checks, when she speaks  these words.

“Me too. But I’m satisfied that I can see you again like this, even though what’s happening may be just a dream.” I reach out to touch her.

Just when my fingers are about to touch her, she replies “If only I had seen the car before it was too late!” She cries, “I literally cannot withstand the separation from you.” She becomes even more grieved.

“No Anna,” I hold back my hand and say, “It’s not your fault. It is an accident; a part of life. I really hope you can find  peace in another world, though I still cannot accept the reality.” I manage to force a smile, with tears in my eyes.

She does not reply and just weeps quietly, as if I were not here. Something else, however, catches my eyes. Photographs, countless photographs are scattered on my bed around Anna. Most of those photos were taken if both of us, but there were also some taken only of me… When did I take out those photos and put them on my bed? I don’t remember it at all. And why were my photos also taken out? Even ir I hqeput those photos on my bed, there would be photos of both of us or her only because I miss her so muchthat I am not in the mood to look at my own photos. It’s strange. Or maybe those photos appeared with Anna; that’s the only way to explain what’s going on.


The next few days Anna is always with me. She follows me, as usual, to school and stores and then back home, but she still does not talk to me. I am not quite sure whether this is what’s literally happening or just my own delusion. But I don’t care, for the only thing I want is for her to stay with me.

There is nothing special today. As usual, I go home with Anna. As soon as we get home, Anna enters my room. These days, I have already become accustomed to Anna to stay with me in my room, so I follow her into it. Seeing her starting to read a book, I join her.

“It’s really an interesting story, isn’t it?” I ask her when we finish a story. But she still does not reply. I know it’s because she is still sad about our separation. When she is sad, she won’t talk to anyone, even  our mum. But she has not spoke for several days. since she first showed up in my room, and I’m worried about her. Just when I’m about to talk to her about that, my mum throws the door open and walks in.

“You know what? That’s enough. You can’t keep doing this.” Mum proclaims with anger.

 While I still don’t know what to say, Anna says, “Doing what?”

“Sweetheart, listen to me. Your sister is dead. She is gone forever. But you, you’ve got a life to live. I know it’s hard to move on, but at least have a try. And it also would be what Tiffany wants. It’s time to let her go.” says my mum in a soft voice.

The moment when I hear my name instead of Anna’s, it seems that my head is struck by lightning. What are they talking about? It was Anna who died of car accident, not me. “Wait, what are you talking about? I’m right here,” I cry with horror.

Anna, as if hearing nothing  I said, replies, “But I just can’t accept the truth that she has left us; I can still feel her , her breath and her warmth, though I can’t see her.”

Oh, honey…”

 Confused and terrified, I reach out to grab my mum’s arm. To my surprise, I fail to do that. My hands become transparent, and I can’t even touch her. I call them with my loudest voice but they seem hear nothing, and gradually, I even can’t hear my own voice. All of a sudden, the reasons why “dead” Anna showed up with a pile of photos, why there are my photos instead of hers, and why she didn’t talk to me… all the confusion and doubt I had become clear. There is only one answer to all these questions. That is I am the one who died, not Anna.

Just at that moment, their voice begins to fade away and the world around me begins to fall apart. And meanwhile, I become unconscious but the very thought that I am dead can’t be more clear.


When I am falling into infinite darkness, I finally figure out what happened. When the truck rushed toward us, Anna was pulled back by a passer-by and  it missed er. But I was not that fortunate. The body that I saw on the stretcher was my own body. Since I share a similar face with Anna, I took it for granted that it was Anna. However, to my surprise, as I finally knew the truth, I’m somehow relieved, for Anna is alive and safe. And when this thought pops up in my mind, the darkness around me turns into light and I think it’s time for me to leave. My body becomes as light as a feather and hovers in the sky to take one last look on my house and my world…


“Hey, Tiffany. Are you listening to me?” Suddenly, Anna’s face appears in my sight again, and her hand waves in front of my eyes. Extremely confused, I look around, finding that we are walking down the street on which the fatal car accident will happen.

“Are you Ok? You don’t look well.” Anna asks with worry.

Realizing something, I reply in a frightening voice, “We need to leave this place right nowbecause something terrible will happen.”

“What? What are you…” Before Anna finishes, a truck slides out of the road and rushes to us…


Maggie 李铭婕  

Student Number: 150111001